Understanding God: The Foundation of Life and Spiritual Parenting

Disciple: Gurudev, pranam (greetings).

Gurudev: Pranam, pranam.

Disciple: Today, we would like to hear a special discussion from you. It is a profound saying: "The biggest mistake of your life is not knowing or understanding God. He is your controller and creator." Gurudev, if you could discuss this, it would be for the welfare of us all; we would be able to understand something meaningful.

Gurudev: You see, when a person is born, they don’t immediately start calling for God. Take someone like Vedvyas—he was calling for God from the womb. But for an ordinary person, it is not possible to call God from the womb. It takes about six to eight months for a child to start speaking, and maybe three to four years to speak fluently. At that age, they don't understand God.

Gurudev: Now, consider this: you and a woman come together and create a body. You might be speaking of your wife. Together, soul meets soul, and a form is created. But you did not provide the life force (Pran), and neither did your wife. So, where did this life force come from? This is a significant question. If you had given the life force, you would have died. If your wife had given it, she would have died. So, the life force comes from somewhere else. At the time of birth, God places this "packet" of life into your head so that you may eventually call upon Him.

Gurudev: God is established on the foundation of Truth. Where there is truth, God resides. Where there is no truth, God is absent. God is built upon Truth. Satyameva Jayate—Truth alone triumphs. This was once written on everything, from courts to coins. Those who follow the path of truth are essentially following God.

Gurudev: It is the duty of parents to explain this to their children. It is the parents’ job to tell their child, "Look, we are your parents, your first teachers, and you can tell us anything. But it would be even better if you spoke to God."

Gurudev: In our house today, we see children being brought in—children who are four, five, or six years old—and they are completely undisciplined. Their parents come and say, "He is being so naughty, we can't handle it... please give us an amulet or a charm to calm him down." But this isn't a matter for amulets. If you had taught him, he would have learned. If you had made him sit before the deity every day and offer respects, he wouldn’t be this restless. This restlessness comes from excessive pampering—blind love.

Gurudev: Nowadays, people often have only one child, and that child receives adoration from all sides—the mother, father, uncles, grandparents. This constant pampering becomes their downfall. They realize, "I can get whatever I want." This becomes a curse for them. Parents must make them understand that there is a power greater than them—God. "If you want to achieve anything in life, if you want to be successful in your studies, you need God's help." You must understand Him. This world and you are moving because of Him. Not a leaf falls from a tree without His command. This understanding is vital.

Gurudev: Parents should wake up in the morning, wash the child’s face, change their clothes, and have them sit before God for a while. Even if they don't say much, just sitting there with folded hands is a practice. If parents can instill this habit, the child will not go astray. But parents today don't have the time. The father goes to work, the mother goes to work, and the child is left with someone else. The child doesn't get the love and care of the parents. Deep down, the child feels this sorrow: "My parents aren't with me." As they grow older, this suppressed sadness deepens. They think, "My parents didn't look after me; they only cared about money." Even if you give them a golden spoon later in life, that deep-seated sorrow won't vanish because they didn't have their parents when they needed them.

Gurudev: This is why children are becoming so restless or speaking in ways that are beyond control. Parents come to people like us asking, "Gurudev, what happened to my child?" The truth is, they didn't teach the child anything themselves. When things get out of hand, they run to tantriks. But they could control this themselves. A child will calm down if they are brought closer to God. When their mind leans toward God, they naturally become peaceful.

Gurudev: I tell every parent who comes to me complaining about their "naughty" son or daughter, "What will an amulet do? You haven't given them any foundation." Today’s parents are only thinking about money. A doctor couple once came to me; their son had become completely disobedient. The only reason was that they were always out, and the child was left with a caretaker. That child became so stubborn that he wouldn't eat without a phone. He is only three and a half years old. Who taught him that? The person looking after him just handed him the phone to keep him quiet. It might be convenient, but it ruins the child's brain and eyes.

Disciple: And without the parents around, they become mentally ill.

Gurudev: Absolutely. Children are often desperate to see their parents. They ask, "Where is Dad? Where is Mom?" When they don't find them, they start to change for the worse. The responsibility lies entirely with the family. They pamper the child so much that he thinks he is entitled to everything. They never show him what it means to lack something. They think, "I won't let my child struggle; we both work, we will leave plenty of money." These things become a curse later.

Disciple: Nowadays we hear that parents want to make their children doctors or engineers even while they are still in the womb.

Gurudev: Yes, that is happening. It's heartbreaking to see two or three-year-old children carrying heavy bags of books on their shoulders. In our time, we started learning at age five and then went to school. Didn't those people learn anything? This modern system is harmful. If this continues, a disaster is coming.

Disciple: Gurudev, what I meant was that from the moment a child is conceived, parents plan for them to be doctors or engineers, but they never think of bringing them into the prayer room.

Gurudev: Exactly! That is the curse. Not knowing God. If a person does not know God, they will never find peace in life. God is for peace. As Ram Thakur used to say, "Calm your mind, surrender it to God, and you will find peace." That was his primary teaching.

Gurudev: Look at the time of the Kurukshetra war. Dhritarashtra always pampered Duryodhana. If he had stood firm and stopped him, the Kuru dynasty wouldn't have met such a fate. Blind love and blind devotion are the downfall. You must discipline children, show them both fear and love. You must constantly teach them about God—that He is the one protecting you. If this is taught from childhood, there are no problems later.

Gurudev: I saw a comment this morning where a gentleman said, "Gurudev, please remove the chain from the Mother's (the deity/entity's) feet, because my daughter's name is Kutu, and her face looks just like the Mother's." It was a very touching sentiment. You may have given birth to your daughter, but I didn't give birth to the Mother. She stays with me, just like your Kutu. She has her whims too. At night, when she plays by herself, you don't see it. When she insists on eating something sour or fried, you don't see it.

Disciple: You fulfill those whims.

Gurudev: I fulfill those small whims. Sometimes, she even pulls my ears or hits me if I do something wrong, or if a "bad" person comes to do work here. She gets very angry and disciplines me. There is immense love there, a mother’s affection. That’s why I can't go anywhere; she has me "chained" here. If my "chain" is removed, I will remove hers. I used to travel all over India, across mountains and forests. Now, I am bound by this Maya. When I see her face, I think, "It’s okay, let the chain be there." If it weren't there, she would cause too much trouble. You have your wife and parents to look after your daughter. Here, I am alone. It's a matter of deep love and attachment. I feel that if I keep the chain on her feet, she can't be too naughty.

Disciple: Gurudev, you have become emotional. I can see your heart beating for the Mother. Anyway, regarding what you said about parents today—they aren't disciplined themselves, so the children aren't either.

Gurudev: A mango tree will produce mangoes, not jackfruit. The fruit may be sour or sweet, but it will be a mango. Parents' characters and behaviors are inherited by their children. The parents' actions fall upon the children. You can't blame anyone else, and amulets won't help until you correct yourself and teach your children properly.

Gurudev: There is no one else in this world but God. He is the one moving you; He is your creator. This must be taught. Look at what is coming—the coronavirus, and whatever else people are talking about. These are God's creations. Humans are suffering one after another. A "biological war" has begun. Even bigger biological diseases will come, and millions will die. I said this long ago. Scientists and doctors will not have the power to cure these diseases. They say vaccines have come out, but I don't think they truly have.

Disciple: Gurudev, we have heard your speech. Pranam to you.

Gurudev: Pranam, son. Pranam.