Interviewer:
Greetings, Gurudeb.
Guru Shyama Khyapa:
Greetings, son.
Interviewer:
Gurudeb, among the many people who come to see you every day—say, out of 50 people—at least 25 are here regarding divorce. Separations between husbands and wives. Some have been married for three months, others for three years. Why is this happening?
Guru Shyama Khyapa:
Why? Well, marriage is an auspicious (Mangolik) matter. Without auspiciousness, there can be no marriage, no family, and no children. Auspiciousness sustains a household. We consider Lord Shiva as the embodiment of auspiciousness. All auspicious things reside on Shiva's head or in the waters of the Ganges. Now, the problem is that people are introducing inauspicious (Amangolik) things into these auspicious events. Specifically, meat. Our ancestors allowed fish—you'll see fish included in marriage gifts (Tattwa)—but meat was never permitted. Meat is the food of ghosts, spirits, and demons. Yet, we are consuming it. This drives away auspiciousness. This is why, just three days after a wedding, the wife leaves or the husband asks for a divorce. This is the root cause: mixing the inauspicious with the auspicious.
Interviewer:
So, even rituals like weddings are being corrupted?
Guru Shyama Khyapa:
Exactly. A wedding should be entirely auspicious, but meat is being served. People eat it with relish, but a few days later, they are filing for divorce. Those who consume it don't care at the time, but ultimately, the ones getting married suffer. I always say: don't bring inauspicious things into auspicious ceremonies like weddings, thread ceremonies, or a child's first rice-eating ceremony. Just the other day, a gentleman came to discuss his daughter's wedding. He had booked everything and ordered meat. I told him, "You are ordering meat for the wedding; watch, your daughter will be back home within three days." He asked what he should do. I told him to cancel the meat order or not tell me about it. By doing this, you are making your daughter and son-in-law suffer.
Interviewer:
It seems the proper rituals for auspicious work aren't being followed.
Guru Shyama Khyapa:
Not at all. As I said, our ancestors accepted fish as auspicious. You see it with betel leaves, betel nuts, and turmeric in marriage rituals. But meat? Never. Nowadays, whether it's chicken or mutton, it has to be there. And the result is a divorce within a week. It's the parents' fault. They refuse to listen to what our ancestors taught. They ask me, "Why shouldn't we eat meat?" I say, "Go ahead and eat, but you'll just be adding to my workload when things go wrong." I refuse to go to any house where meat is served during an auspicious ceremony.
Interviewer:
Gurudeb, these days, you can't even tell the difference between a married and an unmarried woman on the streets.
Guru Shyama Khyapa:
Exactly. No shell bangles (Shakha), no vermilion (Sindoor). These things were meant for the husband's well-being and auspiciousness. But who cares about the husband's well-being now? If one husband leaves, they'll just find another.
Interviewer:
Is this the influence of the Kali Yuga (the age of vice)?
Guru Shyama Khyapa:
Yes, it is. And it will get worse. You won't believe the things I see. Out of every 25 people who come to me, 20 are divorcees.
Interviewer:
I remember when we were kids, our mothers and grandmothers would light lamps in the evening, offer incense, sprinkle holy water, and blow the conch shell. Now, you hardly see that.
Guru Shyama Khyapa:
All of that has stopped. People say they don't have time. The world is moving too fast. But those rituals were signs of an auspicious home. Now people come to me saying their home isn't peaceful, that there are "ghosts" or bad vibes. It's their own fault.
Interviewer:
I've also heard that sprinkling tidal water at the doorstep in the evening removes negative vibrations.
Guru Shyama Khyapa:
Yes, it does. But nowadays, people have become obsessed with "Tantriks." They want a quick fix for everything. A man brought his 5-6 year old son to me saying the boy is restless and won't study. I scolded the father.
Interviewer:
Mischief in childhood actually helps in a child's mental development.
Guru Shyama Khyapa:
Precisely. But they want to control everything. They've stopped putting symbols like the Swastika or "Om" on their doors, which used to provide a sense of peace. Now, it's all about "show" and "fashion." Many couples sit together at night and drink alcohol. It's becoming common in every household.
Interviewer:
Women are even lining up at liquor stores and smoking on the streets.
Guru Shyama Khyapa:
I've seen it with my own eyes. Such vulgarity. No one stops them, and if you try to say something, they'll insult you. Then the parents come to me crying that their daughter has gone astray. Well, who allowed it to happen?
Interviewer:
Gurudeb, there's also the issue of menstruation (Rajaswala). Women today don't follow the traditional restrictions. They enter prayer rooms and touch everything. What are the repercussions?
Guru Shyama Khyapa:
There is a scientific basis for those traditions. In our scriptures, we talk about lust, anger, greed, and attachment (Kama, Krodha, Lobha, Moha). Lust is listed first. During menstruation, a woman's biological impulses are very strong. Our ancestors suggested they stay secluded to maintain the sanctity of the household and the prayer room. It wasn't about hate; it was about discipline. Now, they ignore all of it.
Interviewer:
It seems there's more inauspiciousness than auspiciousness these days.
Guru Shyama Khyapa:
That is the nature of the times. People have a little bit of education and think they know everything, but they lack humility and manners (Shishtachar). True education should bring humility (Vidya Dadati Vinayam). Instead, they are arrogant.
Interviewer:
Is the move toward nuclear families responsible for this?
Guru Shyama Khyapa:
Absolutely. Families have broken apart. Everyone lives in their own little "matchbox" apartment. There are no grandparents or elders to teach children or discipline them. If you scold a child today, they might even leave the house. Parents are afraid of their own children.
Interviewer:
And we are moving further into sin.
Guru Shyama Khyapa:
Sin is increasing every day. You can't even walk on the streets with your family because of the things you see. Mothers today say, "I couldn't do these things, so let my daughter do them." They encourage smoking and drinking, and then they can't handle the consequences. Then they run to a Tantrik saying their daughter is "ruined." You did this to her! I don't blame all parents, but many are at fault. They have no time; both work and leave the child with a maid.
Interviewer:
So auspiciousness is being buried.
Guru Shyama Khyapa:
Everyone "worships" Shiva, but they don't follow the path of auspiciousness. I try to explain this to people, and they agree with me in person, but they don't change their actions at home. They'll spend thousands on a Tantrik to hide their own sins and then tell everyone, "I tried so many doctors and Tantriks, but nothing worked." It's just an excuse.
Interviewer:
Pronam, Gurudeb. Let's end here for today.
Guru Shyama Khyapa:
Be well.
Spiritual Insight
Guru Shyama Khyapa provides a candid analysis of why divorce rates are skyrocketing in modern society. He identifies the root cause as the mixing of auspicious (Mangolik) and inauspicious (Amangolik) elements, particularly the introduction of meat into sacred ceremonies like weddings. Drawing from traditional wisdom, he explains how abandoning time-honored practices—such as wearing symbols of marriage, performing evening rituals, and maintaining family discipline—has created a society where relationships quickly dissolve. The conversation serves as a wake-up call to preserve the sanctity of marriage by honoring the distinction between what is sacred and what is profane.